Using breathing tactics isn't just for childbirth. Using different breathing techniques can heighten sexual awareness and improve your overall experience. Our resident sensual (and especially tantra) knowledgeable couple, Drs. Janelle and Rob, are back (they first talked about sensual sex). They're very passionate and well-versed in tantra, so we're especially glad to hear from them how couples can utilize their tips for better sex! Read on.
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In the early stages of your relationship, you may very likely have experienced moments when at the touch of your partner your breath hitched, your heart sped up and the next thing you knew your breath caught up with your heart rate and came fast and heavy. Yet, have you considered just how important breath is to your intimate life with your lover?
Breath is not just about supplying your body with oxygen. It is far more than that. In fact, using your breath in different ways can enhance your sex life. You can heighten your experience, prolong orgasm, and even pierce the veil between the physical and spiritual dimensions. Keep reading to uncover 7 different ways to magnify and expand upon your lovemaking.
#1 Breathe on your lover
This may be the most obvious way to enhance your intimate play. Use your breath to breathe on your sweetie’s skin. Blow sweet caresses on his/her neck, chest, stomach, palms, inside of the wrists, and ears. Of course, it is also very potent to gently blow warm breaths onto his/her genitals. Don’t overlook placing your lips against the clothing and blowing warm puffs of breath through his/her clothing. This can be very exciting and those clothes may come flying off.
#2 Fan the flame
When you are trying to start a fire what often happens? You need to fan the spark and turn it into a roaring fire. Right? That spark needs oxygen to turn into a hot flame. As you are flirting with and playing with and loving on your partner visualize this. Imagine leaning towards that little spark and gently blowing until it turns into a raging inferno. In fact, you can do this visualization prior to touching your lover or prior to even being in the same location as he/she. Imagination is very powerful and with practice it can light your flame.
#3 Set the rhythm
Your breathing can control your heart rate and ultimately control the pace of your lovemaking. When you slow down your breathing you can slow down your experience. Yet, beware that slowing down your breathing too much can also cause you to lose your sexual desire. So, only slow down your breathing enough to prolong your lovemaking. Taking deep, slow breaths will allow more blood to flow into the genitals and this will enable the penis to swell more as well as the clitoris. This increase in blood flow will help you experience more sensation in the genitals.
#4 Orgasmic breath
Think about it a minute. At the point of orgasm, you probably hold your breath. Most people do. What if you tried to breathe during your orgasm and at climax? This takes practice, but one suggestion is to release your breath with a vocal “oooohhh”. Another sound you can practice releasing at that point is “ooooommmm”. The “om” is more of a vibration than a word. This can vibrate throughout your entire body and your partner’s. Is there really a need for explanation of the impact of a vibration radiating throughout your bodies during orgasm? ;-)
#5 Deepen your bond with tandem breath
Breathing together in tandem can deepen your bond as well as get you in harmony with one another. Sitting facing one another get close enough so that your knees are touching.
You may also sit in the yab yum position (one partner sits cross-legged while the other partner sits facing him/her on his/her lap and wraps his/her legs around the bottom partner). Become aware of your breath. Then focus on inhaling and exhaling at the same time as your lover. You can do this fully clothed and out of bed or to heighten the experience you can sit in yab yum naked and in bed.
#6 Channel energy
Breathing moves energy through your body. As you become aware of your breathing you will become aware of your entire body and the sensations that flow from head to toe and back again. Breathe in deeply pulling energy into your root chakra (located at the base of your spine between the coccyx and pelvic bone) from the Earth. Hold that new energy there and focus on the spinning of that chakra. After a few breaths, move this energy up to the sacral chakra (located just below the navel) as you inhale. Again, focus on spinning that chakra with this increased energy. As you come together with your lover envision your root and sacral chakras blending your energies. This is the beginning of heightening the sexual energetic flow in your body.
#7 Use breath for visualization
Instead of thinking of breathing as taking in oxygen imagine you are breathing in your partner’s love for you and exhaling your love for him/her. Breath or “prana” in Sanskrit is considered to be the life force and is concentrated along the seven main chakras. So, visualize your partner’s breath as life giving love for you and your breath as life giving love for him/her. Become aware of the two of you sharing, blending and exchanging breath integrating your minds, your bodies and your souls.
We're so excited to get a couple writing for GetLusty! They're both adorable, smart and altogether wonderful!Dr. Janelle Alex, Ph.D. and Rob Alex, M.Sc. are writers, counselors as well as Sacred and Sensual Teachers. They recently completed an eBook on "Sexy Challenges: Sacred and Sensual Experiences for Lovers" which is on sale at Amazon! Learn more about them on Inward Oasis.
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