Healthy sex lives aren't just for young couples. Menopause is inevitable for us ladies. And we always think that you should never give up on your sexuality, including after menopause! While there are many changes, there are also many ways to embrace your age and realize that sex is not over. Beyond reaching hot cougar status, menopause can be an exciting new experience in our lives. GetLusty's Lynn Olejniczak provides 10 reasons why you shouldn't worry.
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It’s going to happen. Someday the woman you are, or the woman you love will go through menopause. The good news is, this isn’t Logan’s Run. (You are old enough to know what Logan’s Run is, right?) And the better news is that sex can be better after the change of life. You are probably wondering how that can be.
#1 No more periods
Hurray! No more periods! Think of all the money you'll be saving by not buying feminine hygiene products, you can put those funds towards a monthly sex store trip. OK, you will probably need a moment or two of mourning for the loss of your period. Go ahead. We will wait... Hurray! No periods!
#2 No more baby worries
No periods = no babies. You are free to frolic any week or day of the month that you like. This also means no more birth control; no pills, no IUD, no diaphragm, no sponge, no spermicide. Though you still have to consider STDs and even more STDs like every other couple, you don't have to worry about that little thing called pregnancy.
#3 There's a pill for that
Some doctors may prescribe short-term estrogen therapy to ease the discomfort associated with menopause. This “easing” of the emotional roller coaster associated with menopause can help maintain the sex drive for a while. The use of testosterone is now being examined to not only ease that emotional ride but has a side effect of boosting the sex drive.
#4 Past, present, and future
Chances are if you enjoyed an active libido before menopause, it probably won’t change that much after. We aren’t saying it won’t change at all. But so many factors related to a woman’s sexuality are psychological. In short, if you are in a good place, you will stay there.
#5 Get more intimate
Not feeling frisky? How about some good ol' fashioned intimacy, a more sensual sex session? Alternatively, maybe a loving, sensual massage? Menopause may increase the desire for a different kind of intimacy: longer morning cuddles, more foreplay, flirting, touching, PDA’s may become the happy little keys on your chain. Go ahead, jingle them.
#6 Get your lube on!
The hard truth is, menopausal women will experience some vaginal dryness. As you've heard from one of our favorite sexologists, Megan Stubbs before, "wetter is better." Lubricants are the sure fire way to relieve this issue. If you have never had to use a lubricant in the past, don’t be afraid to now. Today’s water-based lubes have come a long way from sticky gels. Aside from providing the needed moisture, they enhance the experience, and make it more comfortable. So you can still have marathon sex, as long as no one’s back gives out. For more information on lube, feel free to check out our Lube 101 article!
#7 Free to be
Nothing will make one reassess their body image like menopause. Changes are happening, you cannot deny that. Obviously, a proper diet and frequent exercise are important, but accepting certain changes and being happy with who you are goes a long way. When you are happy with who you are, you will be happy before and after menopause. Enjoy your body; and get naked more often! After all, you should love your naked body.
#8 Reaching the peak
Dryness, thinning of vaginal walls and hormone changes are all contributing factors to a change in sexual pleasure. Even though nightly multiple orgasms are replaced by nightly attempts at orgasm, do not despair. Look at this as an opportunity to try new things! Toys that stimulate the clitoris, positions, and oral sex (including cunnilingus) can be lovely ways to vary the experience.
#9 You are wise; aged like a fine wine
Simply put: you know what you want. The beauty of a woman of a certain age is that she has learned what she wants. Women don’t hit their sexual peak at 18, they grow with every experience. Menopause isn’t a surprise, but having the confidence to meet it head on can be empowering. Both in bed and out.
#10 Change brings you closer together
Unless you are Demi Moore or Hugh Hefner, the odds are that your partner is of the same generation. If you're going through menopause, your partner will be experiencing their own performance changes. By showing understanding and patience as your sexuality matures you are only strengthening the relationship as you enter this phase. Being able to navigate this new road with someone who knows your body can provide priceless comfort.
Women are sexual, even after menopause comes knocking. Hello? Have you seen what Sophia Loren looks like these days? There is no reason not to continue being sexual. Embracing this next level of experience; its ups, its downs, its hots, its colds, adds another level to life. A life of many levels is a life well lived.
Lynn Olejniczak is a native Chicagoan who loves her city and everything it has to offer. She spent 10 years as a NASDAQ trader in Chicago and New York in the 90's, then went back to college when "the rules changed and I realized no one was going to pay me lots of money to swear at them anymore."
She loves good food, and a perfectly poured Guinness at any Irish pub in the city. Her Beastie Boys CD's rest comfortably next to her Misfits vinyl, and she believes Underground Garage is the best radio program known to humankind. Armed with degrees in History, and a love of Urban Planning, Lynn is currently writing and researching a book on the 80's Chicago bar scene. Get in touch with Lynn at editorial@getlusty.com.
* * *
It’s going to happen. Someday the woman you are, or the woman you love will go through menopause. The good news is, this isn’t Logan’s Run. (You are old enough to know what Logan’s Run is, right?) And the better news is that sex can be better after the change of life. You are probably wondering how that can be.
#1 No more periods
Hurray! No more periods! Think of all the money you'll be saving by not buying feminine hygiene products, you can put those funds towards a monthly sex store trip. OK, you will probably need a moment or two of mourning for the loss of your period. Go ahead. We will wait... Hurray! No periods!
#2 No more baby worries
No periods = no babies. You are free to frolic any week or day of the month that you like. This also means no more birth control; no pills, no IUD, no diaphragm, no sponge, no spermicide. Though you still have to consider STDs and even more STDs like every other couple, you don't have to worry about that little thing called pregnancy.
#3 There's a pill for that
Some doctors may prescribe short-term estrogen therapy to ease the discomfort associated with menopause. This “easing” of the emotional roller coaster associated with menopause can help maintain the sex drive for a while. The use of testosterone is now being examined to not only ease that emotional ride but has a side effect of boosting the sex drive.
#4 Past, present, and future
Chances are if you enjoyed an active libido before menopause, it probably won’t change that much after. We aren’t saying it won’t change at all. But so many factors related to a woman’s sexuality are psychological. In short, if you are in a good place, you will stay there.
#5 Get more intimate
Not feeling frisky? How about some good ol' fashioned intimacy, a more sensual sex session? Alternatively, maybe a loving, sensual massage? Menopause may increase the desire for a different kind of intimacy: longer morning cuddles, more foreplay, flirting, touching, PDA’s may become the happy little keys on your chain. Go ahead, jingle them.
#6 Get your lube on!
The hard truth is, menopausal women will experience some vaginal dryness. As you've heard from one of our favorite sexologists, Megan Stubbs before, "wetter is better." Lubricants are the sure fire way to relieve this issue. If you have never had to use a lubricant in the past, don’t be afraid to now. Today’s water-based lubes have come a long way from sticky gels. Aside from providing the needed moisture, they enhance the experience, and make it more comfortable. So you can still have marathon sex, as long as no one’s back gives out. For more information on lube, feel free to check out our Lube 101 article!
#7 Free to be
Nothing will make one reassess their body image like menopause. Changes are happening, you cannot deny that. Obviously, a proper diet and frequent exercise are important, but accepting certain changes and being happy with who you are goes a long way. When you are happy with who you are, you will be happy before and after menopause. Enjoy your body; and get naked more often! After all, you should love your naked body.
#8 Reaching the peak
Dryness, thinning of vaginal walls and hormone changes are all contributing factors to a change in sexual pleasure. Even though nightly multiple orgasms are replaced by nightly attempts at orgasm, do not despair. Look at this as an opportunity to try new things! Toys that stimulate the clitoris, positions, and oral sex (including cunnilingus) can be lovely ways to vary the experience.
#9 You are wise; aged like a fine wine
Simply put: you know what you want. The beauty of a woman of a certain age is that she has learned what she wants. Women don’t hit their sexual peak at 18, they grow with every experience. Menopause isn’t a surprise, but having the confidence to meet it head on can be empowering. Both in bed and out.
#10 Change brings you closer together
Unless you are Demi Moore or Hugh Hefner, the odds are that your partner is of the same generation. If you're going through menopause, your partner will be experiencing their own performance changes. By showing understanding and patience as your sexuality matures you are only strengthening the relationship as you enter this phase. Being able to navigate this new road with someone who knows your body can provide priceless comfort.
Women are sexual, even after menopause comes knocking. Hello? Have you seen what Sophia Loren looks like these days? There is no reason not to continue being sexual. Embracing this next level of experience; its ups, its downs, its hots, its colds, adds another level to life. A life of many levels is a life well lived.
Lynn Olejniczak is a native Chicagoan who loves her city and everything it has to offer. She spent 10 years as a NASDAQ trader in Chicago and New York in the 90's, then went back to college when "the rules changed and I realized no one was going to pay me lots of money to swear at them anymore."She loves good food, and a perfectly poured Guinness at any Irish pub in the city. Her Beastie Boys CD's rest comfortably next to her Misfits vinyl, and she believes Underground Garage is the best radio program known to humankind. Armed with degrees in History, and a love of Urban Planning, Lynn is currently writing and researching a book on the 80's Chicago bar scene. Get in touch with Lynn at editorial@getlusty.com.
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